when I was little, I went through a phase where I’d wear my Spiderman costume under all my clothes, so I wore it for about 3 years straight and my mom never found out until one day when we were at a family party, I was wearing the costume under a really fancy and expensive dress, and someone started choking on something so I ripped off the dress to reveal the costume to try and save them, and I think my mom just about had a heart attack
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when I was like 7 I found my brother’s porn on his computer and it was this story about a girl and she went to this mechanics place but she didn’t have any money so she payed with like sex and then so I thought that was how you paid for everything so once we went to target and I started unbuttoning my pants and my mother started screaming
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superlockedhogwartianinthetardis:
Are we ever even taught how to play rock paper scissors or are we just born with the ability to do so?
Silent moment of realisation HOLY SHIT
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thinking about the discovery of food is weird like who picked up a shrimp and thought “imma eat this freaky bug lookin nigga”
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